Sorrow. Grief. And an experiment.

17Nov09

He told me his grandfather had died.

I felt numb. I felt helpless.

I wanted to hold him tight.

But I know he’d only push me away.

Once, I imagined how I would feel if something happened to him.

Nothing. I felt nothing. Then an immediate voice in my head spoke up rejecting the thought.

Then grief from some hidden place ravaged me, leaving me breathless

And in a lot of pain.

I could not move. The moments passed by.

Slowly, I forced my breath out. My entire body ached.

I was weeping silently.

All this, only by imagining.

Thank God for that.

 

 

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2 Responses to “Sorrow. Grief. And an experiment.”

  1. Sometimes life takes us to points when it makes you hard to realise the pain someone’s going through. But the very next point it comes to you as if the world has been thrashed on us. May be that’s the way we people think!!

  2. I can imagine that.. I sometimes think of it of him not being there of me not being there.. both is painful and difficult to even imagine.. In Buddhist practices, one often goes through the process of dying to remove all attachments.. and its extremely painful..

    And when I was very young, I would think, it would be great if I passed on before my parents or anyone.. so that I would not have to feel that.. but now I think that would be more painful..

    Sigh..


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